Friday, September 2, 2011

Found: Bumps and babes

Recently, many friends and family members have been popping little ones left and right. On Facebook the other day, one of my old school mates congratulated a new (mutual friend) mom with "Welcome to the club!"

I feel kinda left out. :p

Not that I'm planning to have one any time soon. Although working at the children's museum does seem to make the bio clock tick faster. My favorite section is the 'I Can Grow' area, for babies and toddlers under the age of 3. Seeing those chubby little cheeks, arms and legs makes me want to chomp on them. I love babies, but I don't know if i'm ready for one of my own.

I came home from a friend's farewell dinner. She is about 3 months' preggers and it was totally unplanned. She is engaged but not married. Her family is very traditional so she got it really bad when they found out. I am very excited for her but a little sad at her family's reaction. My mother-in-law would give anything to have grandbabies NOW, and yet another woman would suffer such grief over the beginnings of a new life. I tried to reassure her that when the baby is born, relationships will be mended. But for now, she is leaving her family and moving to Florida to be with her fiance.

I do wonder from time to time if my turn would ever come. But as I sat in meditation the other day, I had a sudden revelation. A thought popped into my head that said that I would be contented and happy even if i didn't have any children in this life. My yoga class that day had been about finding out who we are. And as I focused on that thought, this was what came about. I had no clue why of all things would I think that, but it is what it is. I think i feel a little more at ease with this knowledge. It takes away all the panic at the back of my mind, about family planning, about where to raise my children, about familial pressures. I don't think this means I've ruled out having children, just that at this present moment, motherhood is the furthest thing on my mind.

I didn't think one little image on Pinterest would spark off the ensuing post, but there it is. On another note, if you have a Pinterest account, add me too!


  1. It IS such a small world! I love my little small town of Boone, but I do love the bigger cities like Charlotte. I'm originally from Raleigh :]

    Ah babies!! Love them. I am absolutely no where near that step in my life, but I visited my nephew the other day and completely got baby fever!

    Love your blog! Count me in as a follower :] Oh, and on Twitter of course!

  2. This kinda relates to what we've been talking about via email. When it's supposed to happen, it will happen. And if it's not supposed to happen, it won't happen. I struggle with this a little bit, too, and I'm not even in a relationship (which makes it even more of a struggle!). Just keep being at peace with the fact that when it's time, things will move forward.

  3. oh honey! *hugs* i know what you mean! first its the weddings and now its all the babies! kinda scary..

    guess that's why it's not that appealing to go back to singapore!!

    and my love, there will be a time for you! xx

  4. I've always marched to my own beat so I've never been on the same path as my friends, even though I think they are all amazing women. I started college later, I've taken risks that would've been scary for some, I've done my own thing and while I don't regret any of it, it has put me in a different place than my friends. One of my best pals just got married, another is engaged, and the third is due next month. I'm happy for them but I'm still not even interested in marriage and I definitely don't want to have children, ever. If it's something you dearly want though, I'm sure you'll get it when the time is right. Life always happens that way. So don't feel left out, just know the babies will come when you're ready, and you'll have had so much practice hanging out with your friends' babies that you'll be a pro mom right from the start. <3

  5. thanks ladies for the reassurances. i'm going to let life take us where it will. :)

  6. Ok, that photo can't be real, can it?? That is just too crazy to be real.

    As you know, I've been struggling with the same thing, and like you, have just decided to wait and take it slow until I feel like our lives are ready, because we are SO not ready. Motherhood can wait for the time being!

    On another note, I hope your friend is OK. :( How terrible that her family can only dwell on her pregnancy out of wedlock, and not on the fact that a new life is being brought into this world and that she will be a mother!

  7. I am happy for you that you have found a place of peace with this. It was a very difficult thing for me for years. I always planned on being a mother and had always wanted to experience pregnancy, breast feeding, having a baby. When we were told we could not conceive I was devastated. It took me years to get over. Until finally one day I realized there are orphans that need parents much more than I need to experience pregnancy, breast feeding or having a little baby. It lead to the biggest fulfillment of my life- adopting, and I am glad my original idea/plan, didn't work out. I wouldn't have it any other way.

    That said, I know parenting isn't for everyone and I have many friends who are not parents and don't plan on becoming parents, who lead very happy and fulfilled lives.

    I wish you much peace and happiness where ever life's road leads you.


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